Consequences of Affairs in Marriages

    Affairs are most commonly interpreted and understood as intimate relationships that people have with another person other than their spouse or official partner. One of the main consequences it causes is breakups and divorces. However, this is only one of its many layers. An affair is an act of infidelity in nature and, as a result, there are two primary types of infidelity, physical and emotional. Both of them have their own sub-categories that build them up, such as visual, fantasy, romantic, and sexual involvements. It is also important to note that each one of these activities is addictive, consequently causing the human brain to seek a stronger form of stimulation, which deepens the level of infidelity.

    One of the first layers of affairs is the fantasy one. It involves a mental detachment, it takes the form of continual intimate contemplation about another person, or things like fictional characters, other than the chosen partner. This opens the way for emotional disconnection within the relationship, which is caused by a change in energy output. The time, care, and emotional investments that were once in the real thing start to get divided, going into the fantasy. It causes negligence in the relationship, which often increases the number of reasons for arguments and disagreements. Thus, decreasing the original intimacy and satisfaction the couple once cherished and enjoyed.

    Visual infidelity then follows it. They are things like pornographic pictures, videos, websites, and any other media that portrays immodesty. Since this activity is much harder to hide than thoughts, it creates a physical erosion of trust. Individuals would have to hide their actions at all costs should they desire to keep them hidden from their significant other, consequently, building up more pressure on the relationship. Generally, it decreases the level of communication, self-esteem, and connection with their partner. The consequence of the discovery of said actions is even more severe because it reveals evidence of secrecy among the couple and damages trust above all else.

    The third level is romantic infidelity, an activity in which one partner gets involved with a specific person and thus lives a “second life”. According to“Affair Prevention” by Scott Gardner, engaging in a romantic affair is basically living a Shakespearean drama story. Over time, individuals begin to crave it, a need to feel something greater than the usual and boring daily life. However, the consequence of this act leads to emotional distress because the fear of this secret coming to light consumes the good character of a person. It increases feelings of shame and guilt while also increasing anxiety. Furthermore, the partner who comes to discover this secret will be left with feelings of self-doubt, inadequacy, and insecurity. At this point, the trust in the relationship will decrease a lot or be broken.

    Lastly, a sexual affair is one of the deepest forms of infidelity as well as the most damaging to any couple, also known as adultery. It can happen with or without emotional attachments and the process of reaching this level is subtle. This happens when individuals become accustomed to getting close to crossing the boundaries of their relationship, eventually, the line gets crossed. As a result, the consequences vary depending on the level of attachment, but common outcomes of this normally are a complete loss of trust and a change in the psychological health of both the betrayed and the unfaithful partner.

    In conclusion, every situation is unique due to the different ways people react to affairs in their relationships. Some are able to work through the challenging period and build a stronger relationship, while other couples may seek to separate and divorce. Nonetheless, the consequences of affairs always last for a long time and trust gets damaged the most.